March 2018 - In Love With the People

Tensing Pen has an amazing vibe as soon as you walk in through the gate. Running into as many staff as guests is always a good sign. We ran into Georgia who said we looked like we were primed for messages (she was 100% on point) and said she’d see us later? After unpacking and getting settled in I headed to the gift shop to grab a lighter. When I walked into the store there wasn’t anyone around. I went next door to the front desk where they told me the shop keeper was setting up merchandise by the pool in preparation for the weekly welcome party. Despite all my research we were being surprised by a welcome party with open bar and passed hors d’oeuvre’s. Sweet! Georgia gave my wife an amazing chair massage within the first few minutes of the cocktail party starting and signed us up for a couple’s massage in the morning.

Tensing Pen encompasses a total of 26 rooms, and being in shoulder season this is a fairly intimate gathering. We end up meeting Bill and Robin, a couple 30 years our senior yet at the same time soul siblings in a sense. After hanging out for a while at their amazing Cove Cottage digs we retired to our Garden Cabin.

Our room was close to the road, yet underneath the owner’s quarters and buried half underground, so the road noise and heat were minimized. Jumping right into my review of the room I noted these points: I didn’t realize there’d be an extra middle room with a day bed. This is where the fridge and shelves for your day to day living existed. That was a huge plus. The room overall, not knowing how it’d be as the cheapest room on site, was far beyond what I expected. Although it’s the only room at the resort with a tiny space in the foliage rather than a lush patio, we made the most of our limited space. When we were in residence the owners were not present. I’ve read that their presence can add a lot of noise from above so booker beware.

The next morning we enjoyed the views and conversation with our continental breakfast and headed down to the super secluded massage hut for outstanding massages. What an amazing start to a trip! After alternating the rest of the morning between our sun platform and the rolling aqua sea, we made our way to the restaurant to enjoy lunch. The smoked marlin salad was pretty awesome with a sushi texture that paired amazingly with e few drops of Pickapeppa sauce.

We relaxed more on the cliffs in the afternoon before walking down to Catcha to Ivan’s for dinner. I had booked the 100 Candles Dinner unbeknownst to the wife! Now in hindsight truth be told I misplayed the dinner slightly… We arrived a little before sunset and got drinks at the bar. We headed out in front of the bar at Ivan’s to the cliffside to watch the sunset. Once I realized how many other people would be joining us in that vicinity I decided we’d be better off heading over to the 100 Candles location.

The 100 Candles Dinner location actually has a slightly obstructed view of the sunset. You have an extra bench that faces out towards the sunset but you kind of need to peek around the fence on the end of the property for a clear view. The right way to play it is to watch the whole sunset from over near the bar, and then ask to be seated. If you wait long enough they’ll already have all the candles lit along the path to your table. On this night the breeze was stiff at times, so our waitress was only able to get all the candles lit for a short time later during dinner. All 5 courses of the dinner were really good, although the soup and salads were filling so we had to take the cake to go. I really liked the lobster thermidor and my wife said the jerk lobster was also good. The service was decent. Our waitress was also assigned to other tables across the cove, so a few times it was easier to refill our own champagnes from the nearby bucket than to wait for her to come back. If money is no object and you want the coolest seat in the house, book the Bird’s Nest location for the dinner. This costs even more but that way you are perched up above everyone at the restaurant and you don’t have a fence in your sightline. Otherwise, I’d save the money and just go to Ivan’s for a normal dinner. I think we paid $250 after tip and I don't think the premium is worth it just to sit across the cove and get the extra courses and champagne.

We only spent 30 minutes or so on the grounds of Catcha before dinner but we did walk around a little by the rooms on the North side of the property and checked out the cliffside sunning/swimming platforms. If we hadn’t just come from Tensing Pen then I’d probably be more impressed. Both hotels seem to deliver top notch food and good service, but the amount of space and seclusion at Tensing Pen is not present at Catcha. They each have a similar number of rooms, but TP has two to three times as much shoreline, which means that many more places to swim, sun and hide away from the world. The few sun platforms that are anywhere near each other at Tensing Pen are seperated by enough foliage that you feel alone. The fact that so many people from around town go to Ivan’s for dinner means an influx of people around sunset wheras very few outsiders come to Tensing Pen for dinner so the daytime exclusivity remains intact.

The last image below I screenshoted from http://wikimapia.org/ It's a pretty amazing resource especially for Negril with so many establishments and not much web presence.

https://youtu.be/y_63hhySJ2w

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Friday morning we fell into our groove of taking our time at breakfast while conversing with Bill and Robin on the mostly empty restaurant patio. They mentioned being interested in checking out YS Falls and Pelican Bar, but I told them I wasn’t into the idea due to the drive time. (I did mention Mayfield/Calico Jack’s as alternative’s). I mentioned that we’d be doing the One Love Bar Crawl and gave them some background info and told them we’d be picked up at 1:50pm but they said they didn’t seem super interested. After a lazy morning on the cliffs we decided to head to Quality’s Sea Breeze for lunch. It seemed like a place that a lot of people in the know recommended.

To quickly backtrack, when we had been driving from the airport I asked Linston to help me better understand the route taxi system. I had a decent understanding of the concepts… a red plate vehicle has a set route, traveling along either the Boulevard (beach) or One Love Drive (cliffs) before circling the roundabout and retracing it’s route. This is a set rate of $1.50 per person no matter how far you travel towards or away from the roundabout. I asked for more guidance on how to ensure I got the route taxi rate and what the customs were. He broke down a few things for me. Stick your thumb out like you’re hitchhiking. Clarify before getting in that this is a route taxi and tell them where you want to go. If you want to go direct from the beach to the cliffs then make them an offer. For two people they would only be making 600J if they were getting route rates during that time, so offer 800J and see if the driver will do it.

We headed out the gate at Tensing Pen and crossed to the other side in front of Shark’s. Within 30 seconds an old sedan with a red plate rounded the corner and I stuck my thumb out. The driver pulled over and I said “route taxi, 300J to Quality’s”. The driver mumbled and nodded and we climbed into the back since the front was occupied by an older woman. We dropped her off just up the lane and waited for her to come back out of the house with money for the cab fare. Once they were settled up we continued back up the West End into town. As we drove I was looking around still trying to get the lay of the land. When I noticed that Canoe was approaching I should have said something as I was pretty sure that Quality’s was nearby on the map, but I figured the driver knew where we were going. As we approached town I mumbled to my wife that we I had ****ed up and we were headed to the roundabout. The driver did not stop but instead asked us where we were going as he circled back. I told him I thought he heard me but he said he had not. Once we got there I gave him a 500J bill, to which he responded that I owed 600J because we had taken the route down and back.

I later asked Linston about this interaction and where I had gone wrong. He said this was the driver’s way of screwing me out of money. Although I sounded halfway like I knew what I was talking about when I got into the taxi, the driver noticed that I did not know where I was going when we approached the destination. I asked Linston “so really the key is to know when to tell them to let you out”. “Ya mon”. Out of curiosity I asked if I could have told the driver to **** off when he asked for more money. Linston said yeah I could have and the driver wouldn’t have pushed back.

I see why they call it Quality’s See Breeze. The stand is across the road from the ocean but with an unobstructed view and breeze. We stepped inside where two ladies were relaxing at the tables. When we inquired about lunch she said that the chef was at the market in Sav getting supplies. He’d be back in an hour but our stomachs couldn’t wait that long so we sauntered over to Canoe where we were the first lunch patrons. Canoe is a nice place. The view and open air is an amazing atmosphere. We ordered the lionfish entrée and the mahi mahi entrée. The fish was just OK. In hindsight I imagine our waitress had nudged us towards the specials board for good reason. The veggies were great though. That’s a trend I was noticing. Amazing huge portions of vegetables at every meal really gives you good energy for adventure.

Our route taxi back to Tensing Pen was uneventful and we regrouped to get ready for Lenbert’s pickup. We mosied out to the road to find Bill and Robin already there. They had decided to join us on the bar crawl. Nice! I had a feeling that we’d be the first pickup of the day since Lenbert lives nearby. As we drove towards Bloody Bay to start picking people up Bill commented to me that he liked the old school reggae Lenbert was playing. Lenbert overheard him and grabbed his MP3 player to start DJ’ing. After he queued up each track he’d give us a few tidbits of info about the song or the artist. He continued this through our first couple stops. By the time we got back to the cliffs we had two busses full of people and roughly 40 minutes had passed.

Once the crawl got rolling it was a blast. We had a mix of people from all over the beach, including a fun group of 10 Canadians vibing the second half of their annual 16 night stay at Grand Pineapple! My favorite spots on the tour included both the low key spots up the lane (The History Bar and ?), Lenbert’s house for his wife’s rum punch, Xtabi’s cave, and Somewhere West.

I spoke with multiple people in town about Lenbert and what their opinions are of his operations. The opinions run the gamut, and in many people you can sense a confliction. Almost everyone agrees that getting people to try new places is good, but no one can agree on which bars should be the “right” ones. I heard from one person that he shouldn’t take people to the village because “the whole thing started to show people a good time”. Another person told me he shouldn’t go to Xtabi because “you think they need it there?” I had a chance to speak with Lenbert one on one and what I think is that he’s a smart enterprising guy, who is also doing something really creative to help his community.

After watching sunset at The Sands we only had a short drive to Tensing Pen. The moment we got off the bus with Bill and Robin, all four of us knew it was time to eat. We headed right across the street to Shark’s. Unfortunately, right as we walked up a group of 2 and another of 5 sat down. I think we all had a decent buzz going, and combined with a few more at Shark’s, we easily passed the 2 hour wait with plenty of laughs and discussion. At one point while we waited the power to the building went out. One of the women walked over to the power lines and fixed it by jiggling them with a long pole. No problem mon! My wife had curry conch and I had brown stew fish. Both were really good with amazingly rich flavors. After the woman asked us how many beers we had drank, she wrote up the bill. We settled up and sashayed back across the street having earned a night’s deep sleep.

https://youtu.be/u7yHZvMtrkk

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The route taxi can be quite the debacle. We have it down now, but have learned to be very specific and always tell them when to stop. I usually offer 600J to get to beach from mid cliffs and it is usually accepted. One time though, we got in route taxi and I confirmed with him that he was indeed a route taxi and we just wanted to get to the roundabout. Taxi driver stops and says 1000J, I said you area route taxi and I always tip, but I am only giving you 500J. He says that we hired him privately and that is why he didn't pick anyone else up. I told him he didn't pick anyone else up because no one wanted a ride. Gave him his 500J and told him we wouldn't be using him again and have a good day. He didn't say anything back, but we learned from others that the drivers already think the route rate is too low and they really hate when tourists use the service. We always pay extra, as I think it is a bit low but we also won't be taken advantage of or intimitdated.

Jamaica is often a riddle wrapped in an enigma and the route taxi is a shining example, I won't even get into the Pub Crawl ;)

Just got caught up with your trip report, and I can relate in so many ways. There's no better way to start a vacation then to exit the airport and see Linston's smiling face! And I agree with your impression on the 100 Candles Dinner. It's nice to do one time, but going forward I would just reserve a regular table with a nice view. I'm also happy to see you got out to have dinner at Shark's. I've said it many times before, but Shark and Juliette are wonderful cooks and their restaurant is our favorite local spot.

PRO TIP: for your next visit - Quality's Sea Breeze offers free pick up and drop off.

Enjoyed your photos and writing -- we did the opposite, we stayed at Catcha Falling Star and ate quite often at Ten Sing Pen (for dinner) -- we also had quite a bit of dinners at Ivan's too. We always ended up eating dinner at Ivan's at 5 p.m. because we're always hungry in Jamaica and it wasn't crowded at all at 5 p.m. We loved all of our meals at both places. We used Linston once and he was great, can't say enough about him, great guy. We were nervous about finding him when we exited the airport but had no trouble at all. When we went a few months ago, there was too many of us so we needed a bigger van. We loved the dogs at Ten Sing Pen too and laughed at how they so enjoyed the lounge chairs around the swimming pool.