lol, i completely understand the concern. i guess i've just never thought about the possibility before!Quote:
Originally Posted by TizzyATX
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lol, i completely understand the concern. i guess i've just never thought about the possibility before!Quote:
Originally Posted by TizzyATX
Great report. Machete is awesome
Kevan - Glad I could put a smile on your face, I sit here in the office smiling like a jackass eating briars remembering the little things that happened each day, I swear people in the office must think I'm nucking futs the way I grin when random thoughts come up.
VVHT - that's what I say, keep it coming, it justs takes a little longer to get back for it (since I'm at work)! LOL
Tizzy - I saw those pictures of ya so you should be worried as well about the flat tire! LOL, I tease the wife that she has her own PFD's (personnal flotation devices) so she will never drown
WPYOGI - after the money i spent on thoose things it was the first thing I thought about when she jumped, proud to say I checked right away and all was safe!
Flip - the machete is like a bad Sienfeld episode, it always comes back to the start. "These pretzels are making me thirsty!" By the way more machete stories to follow!
message for tanfastic. love the stories but really was hoping you would post a couple more pictures of your wife!!!!!!!!!!
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How is this? LOL!
Lmao
Great stuff man, very funny! Big up on the hundred candles, the look it brings is worth every penny and then some. I'm impressed that you plugged on through with it on your travel day. The pass out, though? Dude, that is effing hilarious :) Glad you were weren't spitting cat doo in the morning and able to claim your just desserts. Boogs is the man, but don't forget he's a baby killer... or maimer anyways...
Is that a machete in your pocket or did you just look at your wife????
The Vow Renewal, special dinner at Ivan's (again) and meeting Booger!
On the morning of the Vow Renewal we all decided not to have any drinks before the service at 11:00 a.m. My first thought was hey wait, did you say 11, why would I wait until then when I'm on vacation to wait for a cocktail? The wife knows me all to well and said right away when I got up and we were having this discussion, "you can't drink anyway, you're the Minister performing the service!" So reluctantly I agreed no cocktails until after the service. Off to breakfast we go, get our food, wife gets coffee and I get a mimosa. When I sit down i get my balls busted right away about the mimosa. I stepped in and said "I agreed to no cocktails and I'm living up to my promise" at which time the other wife jumped in (not the bride, but a woman who was in the drunkument a few days earlier) said what do you call that! I told them I agreed not to having cocktails but I never said anything about champagne. After a few minutes they all saw my point and a round of mimosas were ordered for the other couple and my wife.
After breakfast I knew it was time to get serious and to get ready for the Vow Renewal. One point I should make is that the bride requested that the ladies wear orange bikinies with a sarong and the guys (yes including me, the Minister wear kahki's and a black Tommy Bahama shirt. This already had been an issue with the Resort, the wedding planner made a point of saying that they take the service seriously and that there was a dress code for the service. The bride and groom let their feelings be known that this is the way they wanted the service to be done. The planner informed them that the Minister wouldn't do the service if they were dressed like this and thats when they brought it up again that I was doing the service so there isn't any need to worry. She then told them that I needed to be dressed up, it wouldn't be appropriate for me to be so casual, they said no! None of you really know me, but I could live in shorts, t-shirt and flip-flops year round even in the freezing cold, and I pretty much do! When i heard of the issue I thought I was going to blow a gasket and told them that did they want me to talk with them. Both the bridge and groom right away begged me to let them handle it. They did and the service was saved.
Wife and I took a shower, got dressed and headed down to the young bulls room to wait for the service to begin. Once we got there we decided that we all looked great, took some more pictures (Just for you Spanky!)
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And waited for the wedding planner to get us off the verandah in front of the wedding gazebo. It was time, we walked up and the look on the ministers face was worth a million $'s, he was speechless for a second and then asked me if we could talk. He took me aside, told me he was nervous about the service and letting me perform it (I informed him I was licensed and a PROFESSIONAL), I took out my black credit card lisence, embossed in gold ink and showed him. I thought he was impressed but then the questions started flying. For a second I thought I was in front of Perry Mason in the 26th minute of the show, I didn't responfd to most questions but being in Sales was able to deflect them back to him. Finally I could tell he was super annoyed and he said "what Church are you a part of?" to which I said, "what Church are you a part of?" He responded "I'm with the Open Bible Church" and without missing a beat I say, "we're pretty close then, I'm with the closed Bible Church!" and I walk away. I take my position on the "alter", the two "orange bikinies fall into place next to me and "Mr. Young Bull" grabs the video device to record the ceremony. As we are waiting for the bride and groom to show my main man Demar pops up from behind and asks if we want drinks, I hear the chourus of angels above start to sing but then have the carpet pulled out right away and realize we have to wait. I tell Demar to show up in 18 minutes with 6 drinks, "you know what we like!" and off he goes (the choir stopped at this point).
As we stood waiting for the service to start a bee begins to buzz the three of us, my wife freaks, I swat it away and Mrs. Young Bull replies "leave it alone, I never get stung and it will fly away." Well guess what, it stung her right on the inside of her middle finger as soon as the last word spilled from her mouth. All of a sudden she drops the "F" bomb about three times in 2 seconds. I remind her she is at the alter of my place of worship and ask her not to desicrate this holy spot. Of course my wife is crying from laughter, the minister is waiting for this train wreck to start and the bride and groom start walking toward us. Wedding planner slips up, takes off my shades and we begin. I must say that the service was beautiful, I really did a lot of planning and had great comments from all involved incorporated into the service. Tears were flowing from everyone but me (professional) and we had about 40 or 50 people watching by this time since it was a TRUE BEACH WEDDING! 18 minutes into it I was done, we had hired IceBlock to sing a few songs and like a mirage Demar showed up with the drinks, Oh hell yea! We signed the paperwork and it's off to the gardens sweating our balls off to eat cake, drink champagne (not a cocktail!) and more pictures.
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Part two (Dinner at Ivan's & meeting Booger)
Great post.
This trip report is so much fun to read. I've laughed out loud a number of times ("Delightful and Delicious"! omg lol!!)
Your wife is beautiful!
Please Keep it coming;)