Chapter 7
Adversity is a fact of life. It can’t be controlled. What we can control is how we react to it.
– Unknown
Monday dawns and Sunshine is cranky and just plain out of sorts. Don't let the sun outside our window fool you, he is having a cloudy day.
Without wanting to make this story any longer than it need be, Sunshine losing his cool somewhere around the third day of a vacation is not a new phenomena. This has happened before. There is something about the combination of travel, strange schedules and unfamiliar places that seems to lead towards minor meltdowns. Sometimes, in the moment they don't seem that minor. He did once, on day 3 of a 16 day European vacation, declare he was going to the airport and not leaving until someone flew him home. I made him take a nap. By the next morning, most of the clouds had past and by day five, it was like the storm had never come.
In Jamaica, this cloudiness felt harder to me, as I was on unfamiliar ground as well. It is hard to be an anchor when you are already adrift.
We got up, had our Shamrock's OJ, which is the single greatest orange juice I have ever had the pleasure of consuming. We had a few snacks to tide us over, but we did need to find food.
This time we venture towards the beach. I knew from my map that Mama Flo's was not far past Alfred's so we headed on down to check it out. It was on my 'cheap but good eats' list. We arrived and were the only customers.
"Hello" I say.
"Wah woh wah wah," I get in reply. Oh dear, not this again.
"We'd like to have lunch please." Alright, I know it is our breakfast, but since I want lunch food and it is almost lunch time, I am trying to minimize the confusion/requirement for conversation.
"Wah wah wah wah woh wah," with a gesture that seems to imply pick any seat you'd like.
We settle in and our waiter brings menus. This guessing what people are saying thing is going ok. He asks what we would like to drink, at least I hope that is what he said because I answered Red Stripe; it seemed to be the right response. We order off the menu. Waiter disappears to the kitchen, some muffled conversation takes place. Saying nothing at all, our waiter wanders back past us, out to the beach and heads for a swim. Seriously? I have heard about things getting done on Jamaican time, but did our waiter just leave and go for a swim?
I thought it was funny. Sunshine's clouds got a bit darker.
Our food arrived, brought out by the cook, since the waiter is still frolicking in the sea. I had an egg and tomato sandwich, Sunshine had a burger. Though there wasn't anything exactly wrong with the food, it wasn't that great. They may have just been having an off day. Unfortunately, that is just fueling the storm sitting next to me.
We walk back to the hotel and I suggest we settle into the beach. Sunshine plays along for a bit and then declares he is going back to the room. Annoyed, I give him a bit of a "Yeah, whatever," response and seethe for awhile on my lounger.
After a bit of time spent muttering to myself, I started to feel the sun shining on me. It was comforting. I wandered down to the water and floated on my own in the surf for awhile. The waves had a certain soothing quality to them. After a while, I felt my annoyance kind of drifting away. I came to the conclusion that Sunshine having a cloudy day was ok, we all have them. More importantly for me though, this wasn't something I needed to fix; in fact, it wasn't something I even could fix. I was reminded of the serenity prayer. I think this was a 'wisdom to know the difference' moment. In that moment, right then, what I needed to do was enjoy the peace and solitude that was right in front of me.
So I sat on my lounger and I picked up my book. I watched the people go by and enjoyed my day. I wandered back to the room a couple of times, mostly because I needed to pee. Sunshine had the curtains drawn, the lights out and some random TV on. That is ok, I remind myself; if sitting in the dark is his thing today, let him be.
I just love sitting under the palms.
I eventually dragged Sunshine down to watch the sunset, partly because it was good for him but mostly because I didn't want to be alone for that moment. I know I said I would let him be, but I am taking baby steps here.
After the sun had set, I decided it was time to negotiate how the rest of this day was going to go down. I may have been starting to settle into this Jamaica thing, but I wasn't ready to hang out by myself after dark. I also knew that if I don't put a bit of momentum behind Sunshine, he was just as likely to dig himself a deeper hole to wallow in as to snap out of it. Negotiate might not be the right word for how this conversation went down.
"Sunshine, we need a plan for how this evening is going to go down."
"Huh," was his witty reply.
"Well, we've gotta eat and we've gotta drink, neither of which is going to happen if we don't leave the hotel."
"Well, I guess."
"OK, let me rephrase," I continued, "I have to eat and drink. I am not going out there by myself, so you are just going to have to come along.
"I am going to make this simple for you. We are going to walk up to Shamrock's and get supplies. On our way back, we will stop in at Sweet Spot. I know our last visit was a disaster, but we know the food is good, we will have enough money this time and we can just bring it back to the room. After that, you can sit in the room all night if you like."
I got kind of a grumpy look that I loosely translated to agreement.