Why do jamaicans find it so easy to beg.

[negrilbay]

Had some real drama in July, I was staying at NBCC so I could cook, love it, but I overspent, sharing with friends lol. Money ran out two days before I was leaving, went to atm to get more and it eat my card , wow!!
now what to do? I looked at the friends I was sharing with and watching to see if they left or going to help? they stayed but it was different vibe now, they came back with food to cook, and for two days I understood a( little bit) how jamaican feel, sitting on the beach, no money a real eye opener, I went to asking strangers for a cigs and telling my sad story and got a few dollars from tourists too.

[Lola]

Negrilbay, machine ate my card first day I went out in August! Luckily I had a 2nd card as backup but that one charges fees. My bank fedex'd a new card to me, that was great.

[Rob]

If a bank eats it, just let the bank know if they are open. If not, just go back the next day with your ID/Passport and you can get your card back - no problem.

[ohliz]

As soon as they see my cooler on the beach they are quick to ask for a beer or bring an empty cup for something to drink.

WWSDD (What Would Snoop Dog Do?)

So an interesting question would be, why are some visitors so quick to give out their home phone number to people they meet in Jamaica?

Excellent question. No one has mine, why would it be needed? Quite a few have my JA cell #, for meeting up reasons...but my home #? Why?

[Accompong]

When I see the title of this thread, it makes me a little uncomfortable because I resist painting with a wide brush. Jamaicans don't beg.....some people beg and some happen to be Jamaicans.

When I raised beagles as a child, my father used to say "Don't feed the dog at the table if you don't want him to learn to be a begger!"

All you read about is people buying things for their new "friends" and bringing gifts all the time. I do it as well but these are old, dear friends and not some yute that walks the beach trying to become everyone's friend.

You keep feeding a puppy at the table and then try to stop he will grow up to TAKE the food from you one day!

Peace and Guidance.

[Rambo]

In my opinion the only person really qualified to answer this original post is... First a Jamaican, Second one who "works" the streets and beach asking for handouts....we as tourists can ONLY think we know the real answer..........

I look at it as......"I will beg before I steal, and would only Kill long after I have been stealing"....as one poster put it, we cant really KNOW the lives these people go through....

Actually the original post is not a very nice statement.......

[Delta]

Sorry that has happened to you buttrfly. I say find a new driver. Once you out the car and back at your hotel, that's it that's all.

People don't be offended by her original statement; she has apologized for the generalization and it seems as if all she was doing was just venting (some get so sensitive)

[jeannieb]

While the OP may not be PC, we all know what was meant. Was it a generalization, yes. Is it true all Jamaican's beg, no. When I read the OP I thought to myself "this sounds just like me".

I think we have all been asked for something from someone in JA. Be it people we have known for a long time or people we just met. In the last couple months this subject has been brought up on a few JA boards and it has made me re-evaulate our friendships in JA. Looking back there are only about 4-5 people in JA out of all we associate with that have never asked for anything nor do we bring anything and they still come to visit us when we are there. I am seriously looking into some of the "friendships" we have made that WE think are friendships when in fact they are just business deals. It hurts pretty bad when you have hung out with people for 4-5-6 years and WE think we are friends but then it hits that you are just another tourist and they are doing you a service in exchange for what you brought them, whether it be hanging out with you or sharing a meal.

We have a couple of friends in JA that we take gifts to on our returns. (I would do the same here if I went to visit someone I haven't seen in a long time). We don't go handing out gifts to everyone we meet. We take gifts for people we have known a few years who have treated us well and been kind. But when I return the following year and better more $$ things are expected or so and so's friend is now asking just to see what they can get, and we just met them, it makes me go "hmmmm".

I informed a few of the people we know in JA that we will be visiting a new place next trip. They seemed happy for us and said we'd love it. Only 2 said they'd miss us and 1 of the 2 said he'd be driving to see us. Those are 2 of the few that have NEVER asked for anything.

I have learned some lessons recently from these threads. I am no longer taking any gifts down just because they are asked of us. I will take and give what I can afford. If the "friends" are still around when they find out we really are not made of money, then they are friends. If they hit the road, then they only were interested in what they could get from us.

Now, as far as giving out phone numbers...there are about 5 people in JA that have our number. They got our number because a few years back after we knew (thought) we would be going to the same area, we thought it was good idea to have contacts. This was after knowing the people 2 or 3 years. It has been beneficial to some point. When we have any questions about what's going on, we call. Through these people, we have arranged contacts for places to stay, people to carry us in their cars, ect. They call us to check in every so often to make sure everything is ok. Then last year one person started calling asking for money. Sister died, car broke, "I'm broke". I won't lie...at first, we sent some money...but if you give a mouse a cookie, he's going to want a glass of milk. When it got too much, we stopped contact (just recently). His calls ave dwindled since NO has been uttered from our mouth. Now there are only about 3 people who call us every now and then to just check in. It's nice to hear from them. They say it's nice to hear our voice, they miss us. These are the same people who have never asked for anything and the same people who've told us we will love our new destination and 1 even told us "I figured you were ready for a break from here".

Why is it some of us tourists want to make friends so quickly in JA? Why do we let our guard down when it comes to people's intentions? Why are we so trusting? Maybe it's just the way I am?

I have heard on here before, "If you wouldn't do it at home, don't do it in JA". Problem is, I am friendly at home and I do give to others at home. My husband yells at me all the time for being too nice to stangers. STRANGER DANGER he tells me. lol. So what gives?

Rob, you were right in your post that friendships take time to develope. We have to weed out the people with not so good intentions. We are in the process of that now. We may return to our beloved vacation spot in the future but it will be different. We won't have as many "friends" but the ones that remain will be good. *cry*

I have learned so much in the last year since returning from our past (7th, *we're still noobs) trip from people sharing experiances on JA boards. This is one of the subjects that comes up and everyone (including me) at some point says "that'll never happen to me". I remember thinking "I told myself I would never let this happen" but it does and it will. You will lose friends but in the end you will know who is true. Peace all.

[wrtiii]

Jeannie, I understand your disappointment, but I want to be clear that when I've been talking about the "business friendship", that's not a negative - it's just that I need to keep clear in my own mind what's going on. In a couple of months I'll be seeing most of the usual crowd at the same place where we always stay. They'll look out for us while we're there (to some extent), and I'll compensate them (to some extent). They'll be genuinely be happy to see me, and I'll be happy to see them. But I do occasionally need to say (at least to myself) "BS" when I'm hearing a story about why someone needs money, and I don't give them my contact information back at home. In the same way as I don't want to encourage anyone to beg, I don't want to encourage anyone to become a con artist.

[butterfly]

Yes, I have asked and they stated that because you are from America and because they have migrated to America on their visits back to their country they are considered rich.

question(s)::::>>> have you asked this/these question(s) of your Ja-boyfriend AND his family...???...

what they say..??
what did they tell you..??

if i wanted to know why the chicken crossed the road,
i'd ask the chicken