Mr. X does Negril (2010) with No Reservations

[negrilaholic]

"So I am on my float and I go all directions. Out into the ocean. I know I keep saying this but the water is crystal clear and I am floating in the middle of ocean (my story). I swear it is deep but I can see clearly. Still cannot believe I am floating and the water is deep like 100 feet!!!"


That is EXACTLY how I feel..no matter how long I am in Jamaica, the crystal clear waters never cease to amaze me. Am really enjoying your report!

[marley9808]

I asked that same question 5 years ago....who owns that empty property next to the castle? And why isn't that person me? How about the boardies pool our money and buy the land, we could build a place and have a real headquarters! Lol

[Manda81]

A boardie time share ? lol

[Mr. X]

Mr. X Does Negril (2010) with No Reservations

Chapter 48 – Ciao Jamaica
September 8th, 2010 – Wednesday – (Day 5)
Ok she is better and wants to know what I got planned for big birthday dinner. I reiterated the part about coming to Jamaica and the castle and the penthouse directly on cliffs directly on the ocean. She says something about no AC. Anyhow explain about business probably being slow and Teddy taking the night off and that last night with our friends was really birthday lobster dinner. Wow what a great night it was. She acted like she did not hear me. So I guess we are going to that Ciao Jamaica place that we have gone under the banner for 10 times since we have been in Negril.

I remember seeing this place open online a few months ago. Not really what I would pick but its open, close by and one of few options for me. She says ok. Girls always like Italian.

We leave castle for my 3rd trip on foot back same way a little past the grocery store. Pretty dead out. What all the hustlers on break? Morning shift done and night shift not in?

Anyhow just us.
Problem I got is it is not just me walking down road. Wife could be fine and then get a phone call and drift out into the road to get better reception maybe. Can not let a birthday call go unanswered today. So I got to be like cut finger guy and shepherd her in danger spots.

Short walk less than quarter mile. Very dangerous. Buildings are built out to street so in some places literally no shoulder or space to walk on. Cars, motorcycles, trucks fly by around this blind curb. Kind of freaks me out a little. Because of this makes me edgy. The whole driving on the other side of the road messes me up some days.


Dinner at Ciao Jamaica
We arrive maybe 1 other couple dining. Good size place. Have read mixed stuff not going to mention this to my wife. They acted happy to see us. Escorted us to outside balcony seating which we requested after looking around. Sat us and came and took our drink order in what I would consider a very fast time. Brought us drinks fast. Good service. She is not feeling well so we are going to order now. Ask a few questions. I had seen the menu on line. Just waited to see what she orders and base mine on that. Can not remember what she ordered but I ordered the snapper so she must have ordered pasta or something.

Food came out in what I would consider very fast for Negril that was not pre done. I take a couple of bites. Not bad at all. She takes a couple of bites and says she does not feel good and wants to go now. You mean now now? NOW! Dont really remember her ever saying that before. Waiter excuse me need a to go box. Got to go. Sorry. My wife does not feel well at all. Please bring bill and to go box please. Thank you. They boxed food and I paid and we were out the door. The cook seemed genuinely offended that we did not like the food. I assured him everything was great my wife is not well. Thanks so much. Get out door and head straight to Blue Cave Castle. Wife does not stop or look around. I do notice No Limit Bar still looks closed.


Review of Ciao Jamaica
Cannot really say since we left at start of dinner. Guess that kind of stuff never stopped me before. Food not bad just that she is not feeling well and was not really hungry so we left pretty quick. Not there was anything wrong with food. IMO Kind of place that would have killed years ago. Now there are so many great places to eat. Could probably handle a big group. Just not my cup of tea. Not cheap compared to other places. Safe choice if you are right there.

[Mr. X]

Mr. X Does Negril (2010) with No Reservations

Chapter 49 – Later at the Castle
September 8th, 2010 – Wednesday – (Day 5)
Walked back into castle. Tried to reach over and unlock gate myself. Did not work and security guy opened up and kind of shook his head at me. Guess that’s been tried before. Put her to bed (with TV remote) I hung out in courtyard and on my various patios and balconies and terraces and watched the stars from the highest hotel room in Negril. Don’t want to go to sleep it is so cool out here. Mostly quiet. Occasional car. Sometimes later might be 10 minutes before a car passes. Guess mufflers first thing to go on motorcycles because I can hear them from a mile away at least. Sounds like they are going fast and they usually are but still takes a minute to get to the castle and a minute or two to get out of sound range so I might hear 1 motorcycle for 3 or 4 minutes. Kind of cool. Bet if u knew anything about motorcycles u would know all about the motorcycle just from the sound. Me don’t know sh*t about motorcycles except for the most part Jamaican motorcycles are loud.

I live in big city don’t really see the stars that well. Cannot express the view. Stars and Moon are lighting up the ocean. I can see forever in all directions. Highest point is a big deal. Higher than everything except the interior hills which are the only part of my panorama not lit up.

People always talk about best this and best that. I am good with excellent or 2nd best at half the price of 1st best. Does not matter if you are talking best food, hotels or best view. Unless you sampled ALL multiply times over a long time period kind of hard to say the “best”. I guess the best really means the best you have had (recently). May or may not be the best for other people. May or may not be the best for me.

Penthouse of the Blue Cave Castle has the best views I have ever seen in my life. I love views anywhere.
Love the views in San Francisco, New York, etc.
Stayed on top of a crest of a cliff (Ladera like Anse Chastanet but smaller) in St Lucia in a hotel room with only 3 walls and where the fourth wall would be completely opened up the Pitons. Stunning

Blue Cave Castle I am getting so many incredible views in any direction. Best views I have ever seen. Period.

I guess it’s the vast sky and stars above. I can lay out here and stare at them forever. Wow. Oops falling asleep. Tried fighting it. Don’t know if I better sleep out here no telling what could get me. I pull myself up the four steps into the bedroom of the Penthouse. I close door and lock. Wife is sleeping I turn off the TV. Make sure slots in windows are open for maximum breeze. Fan on medium. On high I could not hear the ocean. Look at clock 1159pm.
Hell of a day.
Started off my Reign a little too cocky got slapped by reality. Smartened up after that. Got to earn respect. No freebies. Good thing I have been writing this stuff down or nobody would believe all the crazy sh*t that has happen today.

[Nurse Marcia]

In St Lucia, were you at Anse Chastanet with the view of the Piton's?

[Mr. X]

Mr. X Does Negril (2010) with No Reservations

Chapter 50 – 1st morning at the Castle
Sept 9th, 2010 - Thursday – (Day 6)
Wake up don’t know what time it is, early just starting to get light. I remember that I am staying in Penthouse of a Castle. For some reason this makes me Jump out of bed quick. I can sleep at home. Quick pit stop and got dressed (put flip flops on) and head down the various flights that make up the 39 steps to the courtyard of my castle to see if one place can have coffee before I get down there. Its 545am. Still dark. Walk across the courtyard can smell, hear and see the ocean. Wow. What a view. Get to coffee hut and big old percolator coffee is already set up and waiting on me. Nice. Now that’s how you run a castle. Nobody around nowhere. I got the whole castle to myself and apparently a couple of gallons of coffee. Real Good coffee too! Nobody to bug me. Life is good.

I hang out in courtyard. Plenty of tables and recliners. Queen and most everybody else seem to be still sleeping. Water is so calm and clear. Few fisherman small boats out and not much else. Couple of roosters must live in the general neighborhood. Write a few travel notes. Laptop internet works down here but not in Penthouse. My internet thing not that strong. I got a better one (2011) so probably work better. Enjoy the morning before it gets too hot in the direct sun. 3 or 5 trips back to coffee bar. Pop up to room every half hour or so to check on the queen. And of course the view of my kingdom coming to life. Relaxing and enjoying the peace and quiet. Give thanks and praise (well actually about 3rd time this morning but I have been up for 3 hours.




Check out the creamer that goes with the coffee. They call it milk but looks a little off color and is probably some kind of heavy crème. I noticed both the “milk” and the plastic container holding the brown sugar were on saucers with water surrounding the containers for the milk and sugar are right in the middle of the water. I guess maybe they were packed in ice and it melted? Anyhow it is warm. I spilt a little crème and coffee got to find a paper towel. Don’t see any around. Don’t want to leave a mess.

Got little walk way along edge of property surely they got paper towels or rags in kitchen/restaurant area.







Plumbing codes maybe little different in other countries
Do not see that many outside sinks where I am from.
Looks like that p-trap is upside down

Go all the way back. I see a young guy. Hey what’s up? I need a few paper towels I got a little spill. No problem. He gets me a couple of paper towels. Seems like a nice guy. As I am leaving I remember what is really important in life. Always got to think big picture.

Hey listen man I will be sitting out there all morning if that Teddy Chef guy comes around you please come get me right away.
He gets this funny look on his face.
I AM TEDDY!! He says.
We laugh.

I am trying not to be judgmental. I prefer my Chefs to be old and fat. He is young and skinny. I am trying to open my mind and concentrate on the big picture and not get caught up in stupid prejudices. Results over petty idiosyncrasies.

Ok Teddy this is the deal the only reason I am staying in this old hell hole of a castle is because of ur food. I heard it was really good. Last night wife’s big birthday and u were gone. Whole vacation was based on u and u No showed me last night. Killing me Teddy. Killing me. I can screw up enough with my wife’s birthday as it is without any help from u. Only you can make things right. Here is the deal I want to get on the Teddy’s meal plan. You know about the Teddy’s meal plan don’t you?

He kind of looked confused

Teddy’s Meal Plan you know about that?

He shakes his head and says not sure what that means.
I say Teddy’s Meal Plan is the plan where I give you $100 (US) right now and you keep bring me food until we are even. Tax, tip everything.
How does that sound?

Cool he says with big smile on his face. (Remember its offseason, slow season)
Now I say it’s just me and my wife and we are leaving tomorrow but I am going to want ur Famous Lobster Themodore and she is going to want ur Famous Mountain Pepper Shrimp tonight for dinner.
Cool I say?
No Worries Brother he says.
Cool

Sure you are thinking I am back stuck at an All-Inclusive (AI) that I cannot leave the "compound”?

On the other hand maybe I just got a top notch personal chef prepaid for my prepaid penthouse of my oceanfront castle.

I think I will go to one of my 4 balconies and look down on all the little people.
BRING ME MY WINE! I am shouting.
BRING ME MY WINE!!! Don’t really drink wine but I can’t help yelling it.
OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!!
OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!! I shout from the top level.



Its 8:45am … May have to throttled back on the coffee a little.
Cannot help it I got no experience on how to act with my own freaking castle.

[Mr. X]

Mr. X Does Negril (2010) with No Reservations

Chapter 51 – Later 1st morning at the Castle

Sept 9th, 2010 - Thursday – (Day 6)
Queen still sick. I explained the Teddy meal plan and how good it is going to be. She is not hungry and does not want to come down. Please come down and eat and drink and if you don’t feel good then go back to bed. She mentions something about a ghost last night. I am kind of in a hurry to get back down the 4 flights of steps to the courtyard to order breakfast from Teddy and start the Royal food sampling. But no. can’t be that simple. I got to stop and ask about the “ghost”. I know I locked all the doors. And everything is still here and the ghost did not harm us in any way. Maybe it was a dream due to ur sick condition? I think I saw a ghost by the door. Well listen honey nowhere on the board did I read anything about the castle being haunted. Besides it’s only like 30 years old. Not like it is an old haunted castle. She seems better about it and decides to come get coffee and food.

I feel better about situation. Its upsetting wife not feeling well on vacation and the room could be haunted. On the other hand I have prepaid for the Penthouse of a Castle and Now I have a prepaid personal chef lined up. Well not that hard of decision. I am feeling pretty good.

Come outside and look at the little houses and little people from the top of ur castle. Have wife do the beauty queen/movie star slow open hand wave to the boats going by. Boats always stare and wave at the castle. Even she admits this makes her feel better. We go down to coffee bar. Spot I forgot to clean up because I was so excited about my deal with Teddy now has 1000 ants that came from nowhere to suck up the crème I spilled. Now I get it those are not melted ice around the sugar and creamer on small plates (saucers?) those are water barriers. Moats to keep the ants at bay.

Beautiful but you are not in a plastic bubble with a sterile environment. Nature. Teddy comes out. Make introductions with wife and Teddy. Order. Just could not do the Jamaican special of Ackee and Salt fish. 4 days in a row I ordered the special breakfast wherever I was. I greatly enjoyed all 4 times.

Apparently 4 days is my limit of days in a row with the Jamaican National dish of ackee and salt fish, Johnny cakes etc. Calaloo. I ate it first breakfast and craved it next 3 breakfasts and greatly enjoyed but I can’t do it no more. Some kind of non-pancake dishes. Some kind of shrimp scramble.
Wife was looking at blackberry or something (before IPhone)
Took 1 bite of her food.
Looked up from phone
Said best food of whole trip
Back to Facebook.
Ate couple more bites and went back to bed
I was forced to eat both breakfasts in the name of research and of course munchies.

Going to be only full day at the castle. Nothing planned at all except having fun at the castle until our sunset late afternoon at castle complete with a Royal Cruise aboard the King’s Yacht.

Played in water. Saw 2 locals divers get out of water at the unfinished castle. They did not catch but 2 fish. Both were about 2 &1/2 feet long. Nice fish. We yelled from float and they smiled and held them up and said Barracuda. Rest of day everywhere I went I told people about the fish. (That’s the kind of thing people like to hear about) by next day everybody in the area knew about the 2 big fish and who caught them. News travels fast in small town.

Made another trip to the L & M store. 4th time leaving the castle on foot. 3rd solo.
It sad the strong always prey on the weak.
I wish it were not that way.
Just the way it is.
Always has been.
Always will be.
The hustlers don’t even bother with me anymore.
They look up and see me. “Shake their heads and say crazy white man” and just turn their eyes.
Not going to let them off the hook that easy. When I get back from store and before entering my castle.
“I thought u guys were some kind of “hustlers” looks to me u are just sitting around in the shade all day”
“Some white guy was down there giving out money. It was crazy. Guy was drunk or something just starts handing out money. Everybody starts leaning forward and looking at me. Down there. (I point from the direction I came). Even gave me a $10 bill I say and hold it up. Yeah he left I say as I pop back in the castle. Suckers!

[marley9808]

LOL!!!
Mr. X, your posts are the highlight of my morning....best way to start the day. Loving it!

[Mr. X]

Mr. X Does Negril (2010) with No Reservations

Chapter 52 – Even later 1st morning at the Castle
Sept 9th, 2010 - Thursday – (Day 6)

I had seen Famous Vincent yesterday when we were at Catcha Falling Star and told him to stop by the Blue Cave Castle and we would set something up for a sunset cruise on Thursday. Many of the boats look alike but when they get closer u can recognize Famous Vincent piloting Elvira and usually first mated by Roger.

I see them from the top of my castle. I wave and they wave. I say hold on I will meet u down at the landing. Down the 39 steps to the courtyard and then a bunch more to get all the way down to the water. No problem all downhill. I jump on boat and say hello to Vincent. I am looking at Famous Vincent and I know I have met him before. He says he remembers me. Sure thing but it has to be more than 15 years since I have seen him. (Which is how long I have known wifey so best gloss over who I was with I tell him). Too funny all this time when people talk about him on the board I thought I did not know him yet I did. Anyhow we catch up for a few minutes.

Hey Vincent this is what I would like to do. If you can do it great if not no problem. I would like to take a sunset cruise. Just slowing cruising up the coastline of the cliffs. Don’t want to go to beach or even snorkel today just a slow easy relaxing cruise. Then wherever the best sunset is today Catcha or the Caves we will be between them and the sunset for the best possible view. I got me and my wife and my friend and his wife who live here in Negril. I would like for it to be just us. Would $100 be fair? He smiled and shook my hand. Cool. We agree on 415pm. Kool. (How did u arrive at $100? Well this is what I had budgeted. He usually does $20 a person to snorkel. 4 of us so say $80. Offseason and very slow. I want to be fair and generous but I always don’t want to run out of money.) Anyhow if Vincent says it is cool then it is cool.


So I got the Royal Yacht lined up so that leaves me all day to play at the castle until about 4pm then I can get ready for sunset cruise.

I float, swim, snorkel and jump off cliffs all day. As I mentioned earlier cliff jumping is something that’s fun for me. I know I don’t look cool or graceful but since nobody around I don’t care.





Little cloudy and overcast. I love it. Warm but not hot. Besides it always seems to clear up for a beautiful sunset.




This is sky at 430pm. Wonder how sunset will turn out today?