yvonne i think you answered your own query quite nicely here:I still don't understand why a no thank you works for a seasoned longtimer but not for a newbie.longtimers aren't intimidated or worried, we have no expectation of being nervous, we're not thinking: "How do we handle it? - What do I say? - Will it work? - What if it doesn't work? - Am I safe?newbies being unsure of how to handle themselves often contributes
Our body language, facial expression, and general way of being reflects confidence and ease, (instead of all that stuff), before we even open our mouths.
* please note i'm NOT saying all newbies *do* have those thoughts, or that they are all worried, have no confidence, etc -- just that those are examples of things that can possibly be more of a factor for those who are unfamiliar *
at the other end of the extreme - some people are actually afraid.....i read a report by a guy who said his wife "screamed in fear" when someone put a bracelet on her arm (i mean - really?) - husband reacted with aggression in return, perceiving it as if his wife was being 'attacked' .... of course that was not received well, and it was on - with the expected unpleasant result, and all negativity and "warnings" in the trip report. They went into it ALREADY so afraid and jittery, that they had almost no chance of a positive interaction no matter what ..... never mind the possibility of being friendly & relaxed, and maybe meeting a new person, having a nice chat or fun interaction, even if they were not buying something.
so i really think a lot of it has to do with what's going on in ppl's heads as they are approached, and the resulting body language created from that ... vendors may not have university educations, but from what i've experienced, they are true experts at 'reading people' even before approaching them.
