First Timer: Just go back from Negril

[Yvonne]

Yvonne, as a longtime/longterm visitor maybe you are approached differently than a newbie? I know that's the case for me. People in Negril know me by face - if not by name - and I am usually treated very differently than first timers. Having been to Negril and stayed for weeks on end for more than a dozen years, I'm known by people who live there. Yet on more than one occasion I have been on the beach with friends, and maybe gone in for a nap or to the store, come back and my friends are surrounded by sellers who scatter when they see a face that they recognize. Sometimes, especially with newbies, "NO" (even a firm one) is not respected.

Apparently so. I don't get bothered but I am asked to buy things. Also, my experience - on top of the familiar face - I know how to handle anyone who may not know me from 25 years of coming here. Lots of new guests arrived Friday so it was interesting watching the vendors swarm them yesterday on the beach. I should narrow that to jet ski vendors. The food/fruit/jewelry/CD vendors were all fine. Now it makes me wonder if it's mostly the aggressive young guys who won't take no for an answer.

When I brought a newbie friend a few years ago, she was a target - & a sucker - whenever she'd walk on the beach w/out me. She had been advised of what to expect & how to handle it but did not do a good job of it. I think newbies being unsure of how to handle themselves often contributes to their higgler frustration. It sounds though like Plain Jane was prepared. I still don't understand why a no thank you works for a seasoned longtimer but not for a newbie.

[Lynntt]

Really good points - you're making me remember a good friend who did not get "hassled" ... she lives in New York City and after the first couple of encounters on her first day she handled things like a longtime visitor. Meaning she wasn't hassled other than the few comments and come-ons that we all get - LOL!! Personality probably has a lot to do with it as you say; my best friend is kind of a sucker for a sob story at home and in Negril and as such gets hassled a lot more than I do even though we're both old hands at dealing with unwanted solicitations.

I guess I'd better finish my packing now - I'll look for you when I get to your part of the beach Yvonne!

[Rambo]

many times our friend, also Taxi driver will ask if its OK to stop a second.....we say "sure", and he will pull over, run over to a "street person" and slip him a few bucks..........so everybody is affected in the same way, I will always "leave some on the table" for a person who is working, and still struggling..............
we all gotta remember........ "where we started"

we dont have a problem as a rule.....sometimes maybe its the way NO is said?

[justchuck]

Glad to hear you enjoyed Negril!

[MissBlue]

I still don't understand why a no thank you works for a seasoned longtimer but not for a newbie.

yvonne i think you answered your own query quite nicely here:

newbies being unsure of how to handle themselves often contributes

longtimers aren't intimidated or worried, we have no expectation of being nervous, we're not thinking: "How do we handle it? - What do I say? - Will it work? - What if it doesn't work? - Am I safe?
Our body language, facial expression, and general way of being reflects confidence and ease, (instead of all that stuff), before we even open our mouths.

* please note i'm NOT saying all newbies *do* have those thoughts, or that they are all worried, have no confidence, etc -- just that those are examples of things that can possibly be more of a factor for those who are unfamiliar *

at the other end of the extreme - some people are actually afraid.....i read a report by a guy who said his wife "screamed in fear" when someone put a bracelet on her arm (i mean - really?) - husband reacted with aggression in return, perceiving it as if his wife was being 'attacked' .... of course that was not received well, and it was on - with the expected unpleasant result, and all negativity and "warnings" in the trip report. They went into it ALREADY so afraid and jittery, that they had almost no chance of a positive interaction no matter what ..... never mind the possibility of being friendly & relaxed, and maybe meeting a new person, having a nice chat or fun interaction, even if they were not buying something.

so i really think a lot of it has to do with what's going on in ppl's heads as they are approached, and the resulting body language created from that ... vendors may not have university educations, but from what i've experienced, they are true experts at 'reading people' even before approaching them.

[mud]

clarity, i just returned from san francisco.i stayed ay my uncles house at the top of california street.unfortunetly,the cable cars started operating the tuesday after i left.they reparied the street i guess,and the calves of both legs were so sore from walking up and down california street,i could hardly get out of bed in the morning thr first day make to minnesota.i just wanted to tell you,the goldengate bridge is one of the most beautiful things i saw on that trip.be proud of it cause its a jewl

[Yvonne]

I experienced someone who would not take no for an answer the other day. Actually it wasn't me, but a friend, a man who has been coming to Negril 2X a year for decades, i.e., someone who knows how to handle himself. I was meeting up w/ my long time friend to walk the beach & he was talking w/ a Jamaican who kept asking him for $100-200 for food. Friend kept telling him no but the guy kept arguing that it was his responsibility (friend's) to give him money since he needed it. This guy apparently doesn't know me. When I arrived on the scene I could only take about 60 seconds of the pestering as we walked & he was asked (by friend) to leave us be. The guy kept following & going on & on. I spoke up & finally got the guy to quit following us & insisting he be given $$$. It didn't turn ugly or anything like that (I'm assertive, not aggressive) but he had a parting comment to my friend. "See you later, mi friend, but next time don't bring her with you." We had a good laugh & I still chuckle every time I think of it.