This is a topic that has been on the Negril Message Board pretty much since its inception in 1997. Negril.com was 2 years old at the time and the topic came on the Board from nearly its first day.
Before moving here, I looked at the older tourist men taking advantage of young Jamaican female adults as painfully regrettable if not abhorrent, as I still do. I have never thought of it merely as a case of "two consenting adults", because obviously one party was using their vast economic differences to make the much younger, disadvantaged woman do what they wanted. When the man was twice their age, 20 to 45 years older than their "date", it felt to me to be nearly a form of sexual predator behaviour.
After I moved here and started Negril.com, I would run into older women who asked me about their "friend" who they had been "dating" on their vacations to Negril. They would wonder if the "friend" was trust worthy, honest and essentially a good person and wanted me to clue them in to the truth.
I would often ask them a few questions. If you met him on the beach during the day and he had all the time in world to be with you on your vacation, do you think he has a real job? How many actual hours have you spent with them, not the number of years you have known them, but the actual number of physical hours have you been in the company of one another? Do you find yourself spending more money than you anticipated in this "relationship"?
I thought these few simple questions would help to open their eyes to the truth, but in every case it backfired on me. The women were looking for confirmation not the truth. Most stopped talking to me. But one case did come back to me full circle.
As Seveen stated, nearly like clockwork one women came back to me 5 years later to say she should have listened to me. After marrying her "friend" and getting him to the US of A, he got his citizenship and disappeared. She asked me how she could have been so stupid. Thankfully, I did not respond to that question... (grin)
Dash brings up a good point how the article Bnewb posted has opened his eyes. I hope it opens more eyes to the reality. I felt the same way as Dash years ago.
In the article it is noted that the women dont think of themselves as "sex tourists" and seem to like the term "romance tourists" better. But calling it something different doesnt change the truth of the situation.
In the article, the author quotes a long time visitor to Negril, "Dawn" as follows:
"'I used to think Derrick was respectful of me and really loved me, until I heard him laughing with the other boys one night. It turned my blood cold.’
Dawn met Derrick on her first trip to Negril in 2006 and has since returned twice a year to spend time with him. Derrick is now 27 and Dawn is 30 years older than him.
‘I fell head over heels with him when we first met and he couldn’t get enough of me, but I’m not daft,’ she says.
‘I knew he was as keen on my money as he was on me but they have nothing here and live like paupers.’"
Let's take a second to look at this scenario. The article was written in 2013. Dawn met Derrick in 2006. That is 7 years ago, so Derrick was 19 or 20 at best when they met. Dawn is 30 years older than Derrick so she was about 50 when they met.
As I mentioned, when I see a 50 year old man who is a tourist with a 20 year old female with no money, no car, no home, I dont see consenting adults. And now, after 20 years of living here and seeing the article play out time and time again, I view a 50 year old female tourist with a 20 year old Jamaican man in the same light.
Another article from January makes this slightly different case and adds some more light on the issue. Here is a quote from ABC Australia in reference to the Bali "romance tourism":
"They treat you like a queen. They make you feel like a woman, someone young and beautiful, not an old-age pensioner. It's all about sex and fun - they're handsome, attentive young men who are full of life. When I get bored I can send them away. I'm the one in control and they accept the rules I make."
http://www.abc.net.au/unleashed/4476716.html
When one party is in full control of the relationship - is it actually consentual, or for the disadvantaged is it simply a means of getting by?
And the author notes the increase in "romance tourism" marketing and wonders:
"So how much longer are we going to continue excoriating all those Rons for the kind of behaviour we condone and even celebrate when Rhondas engage in it?"
